Help me Monster Girl!
I’m a girl and recently a friend of mine (also a girl) has started dating a new boy. I was very excited for her in the beginning but then I started feeling really jealous, especially when its just the three of us. I cringe when they hug, I feel sick when they kiss and don’t even get me started when they do all the cutesy, baby talk that couples do. I discovered that my jealousy came from the feelings I have for her, the romantic feelings that I have for her. What should I do? I don’t want to ruin my friendship, but I can’t deny my feelings for her. HELP!
In the eternal words of my fantasy gay grandpa, George Takei, Oh my! You’ve got quite the
not-so-really love triangle going on. But I have been through the same thing many times in my life. When we build relationships between people, we often begin to feel feelings that are not defined as being the strictly platonic heterosexual relations that happen between friends. It’s natural to love our friends, but consider their feelings too. Love your friend, channel this crush into a healthy loving friendship but don’t take it too far. But lets be real, she’s not dating you, she’s dating him. It’s not your place to intersect into their relationship, it’s not right. That’s your friend right? You care for her? Then respect her decision to date whomever she so chooses. Also you have to decide what is more important to you, your friendship or these feelings? And I hate to be a buzzkill but these feelings only surfaced because she was in a relationship with someone else, maybe you are jealous of the time she’s spending with someone else and you’re getting a little possessive. That’s why I say chill, just keep being a good friend and be there for her. Support her, and hopefully you’ll be able to figure out how to love her, as a friend.
In the meantime, listen to this song about girl crushes called “Jenny” by Studio Killers
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